Six Months or Six Years
by Ai Tennshi
Summary: At the age of thirteen, Rin finally makes a decision—whether to live with demons, or with humans.


_Disclaimer: I own nothing recognizable from Inuyasha._

If love was a strange, wondrous, inexplicable phenomenon, then there was none who knew this as well as Rin. Rin had lived out her life in a manner that was somewhat unique, as far as she knew. Of course, there were demons who lived in the village, but Shippou was barely a child with powers that could scarcely harm anyone and Inuyasha was only half demon, and his behavior tended to be somewhat more human than demon.

Or that was what everyone said. As far as Rin was concerned, there was nothing to be said regarding "demon-like" or "human-like" behavior. There were mean people and there were nice people, and demons and humans could be either kind of people.

There had been a time, once, when Rin would have claimed that humans could be worse than demons. But now, having lived with humans for six years straight, she found that conviction dead and buried. She had human playmates as well as demon ones, and there were now many humans who were dear to her heart.

Of course, these particular humans were ones she had felt an affinity to from the start. Sango-sama, Miroku-sama and Kaede-sama had all seemed quite nice, and much as Sesshoumaru-sama had professed to detest his brother and the company he kept, he had never berated Rin for spending time with them.

When her master had first informed her that she was remaining with Kaede-sama in the human village, she had argued. She had screamed, cried and thrown the biggest tantrum she had ever thrown in any of her lives, but Sesshoumaru-sama had remained unmoved and simply told her to be quiet. She was, Sesshoumaru-sama had explained, afraid to live in a human community. Stronger than her desire to stay with him was her desire to stay away from humans. He would not be followed out of fear. She was to stay with humans and learn their ways, and if, when he saw fit, she still wished to come with him, then she was free to return.

So she had gone.

The first few days had been the worst. She had curled up in the corner of Kaede-sama's hut and refused to cry, talk, eat or sleep. Then Sango-sama had come to her, sat beside her, and just started talking. She talked about Kohaku, about her father, about their city… Eventually, Rin found her natural curiosity piqued, and started asking questions.

She had cheered up considerably to realize that it wasn't goodbye for good. The first time Sesshoumaru-sama came, she had run up to him and asked him if he had come to take her back yet. Sesshoumaru-sama had asked if the humans had mistreated her, and when the reply was that they had not, he informed her that then she obviously needed more time with them. He gifted her with a box of exotic sweets and was gone.

So Rin had come to terms with the fact that Sesshoumaru-sama would not let her come back unless she genuinely seemed to be enjoying herself, and tried to do so. As time went by, it became easier. Life was good in this village, and with Inuyasha and Shippou among them, the villagers scarcely ever badmouthed demons in general. They did explain to Rin that there were evil demons out there, so she shouldn't go trusting every demon she saw, but they also conceded that the same was true of humans. By the time the first year was up, Rin was perfectly at home and her prejudices against humans were gone.

Now, at the age of thirteen, Rin had spent six months with Sesshoumaru-sama and six years in a human village. She was comfortable with demons and humans alike.

But still, strongest of all was her love for Sesshoumaru-sama.

She would have felt abandoned had he not been sure to come at least once a month. On each visit he brought for her some human gift: sometimes a sweet, sometimes a kimono, sometimes a musical instrument. Once, when he had skipped a month, Rin had run to him crying on his arrival, for she had worried that he had fallen wounded again. Though he scolded her at the time for her concern, he had never missed another month.

But still, he would not allow her to return with him.

Then, in the fourth month of her thirteenth year, she woke to find blood between her legs and begun to scream. Kaede-sama was there instantly, soothing her and explaining to her what it was and what it entailed.

"So I can have babies now?"

"Aye, child."

"And I have to bleed like this every month, unless I have babies?"

"Aye, child."

"What if I don't want babies?"

"The moon's cycles will bring the blood nevertheless. The moon doesn't care either way."

So Rin resigned herself to the difficult task of becoming a woman, and learned what herbs to use to slow the flow, what herbs to use to prevent conception, and the times of months when she was most fertile. Then Kaede-sama explained to Rin what making babies entailed. Having seen animals, demons, and certain people of her childhood village in the forest performing such rituals, Rin hardly blushed and felt simply a vague acceptance of the fact.

Then the young men of the village began delivering betrothal offers, and Rin suddenly fully understood what her sudden rise to womanhood meant. Suddenly, the mating ritual was no longer one which she must accept as something that others did, but something which she must eventually participate in. She seriously considered this, and eventually came to the conclusion that she really did not want to mate—for that matter, she did not even want to marry.

That night, Sesshoumaru-sama came.

"You have bled." His face was impassive.

"Yes, Sesshoumaru-sama."

"They have explained to you what this means?"

"Yes, Sesshoumaru-sama. I can have babies, and I will bleed every month unless I do, because the moon's cycles don't care."

"That is only the most apparent of matters. As a human, you will now be expected to wed—not to do so would be a breach of their customs, and only accepted if you become a priestess or something similar, wherein celibacy is accepted."

"Yes, Sesshoumaru-sama. I have received offers of betrothal offers. I have no wish to wed or to mate."

"This may change with time. You still have years yet in which to decide."

"No, Sesshoumaru-sama. I have already decided."

"I see. You will train to become a priestess, then?"

"If you do not allow me to go with you, then I shall do so. But I wish to leave with you, Sesshoumaru-sama."

He looked steadily at her; she did not waver under his gaze. Then he nodded once, and turned away.

Delighted, Rin rushed to grab her pouch of herbs and ran after her master into the forest.

Really, there had never been any doubt about it. From the moment her heart had begun to beat the second time, and her eyes had fluttered open to find herself in the arms of her mysterious, beautiful, wounded stranger, she had been his in mind, body and soul.

_Author's Note: It's interesting to speculate on the relationship between these two. On one hand, they're not exactly family, and on the other, they're not exactly lover material. It's fun to speculate that Sesshoumaru and Rin might find they're attracted to each other when Rin gets older, but they don't necessarily have to be. So this is an attempt to portray that strange, soul-deep bond in a platonic way._


End file.
